So we began exploring in the last talk and you continued yesterday in the small groups. Exploring nothing to attain, no gaining. And the ordinary understanding of practicing something is we practice to get better. We practice the flute, we practice our knife work in the kitchen. We hope to improve. And we hope to get better. But the kind of practice we're engaged in is not this ordinary practice.

[01:06]

About simply being who we are. Suzuki Roshi mentioned these two laws, what he called laws of practice. If we seek something, we'll be disappointed. And for practice to come alive, we have to give. And it's a kind of giving that's complete and wholehearted. It's about giving ourselves.

[02:07]

Giving ourselves quite obviously to Zazen. but extending that giving through each activity we're engaged in together and it's an energetic giving we spoke yesterday in the staff meeting about our chanting And particularly in the morning and particularly to the amount I can hear, the robe chant has been kind of anemic.

[03:13]

And so we agreed we would begin with who was at the meeting to make an effort. To bring energy to our chanting together. And it may have been a little raucous, a little uncontrolled. But I really appreciated the awakeness and the energy in the chanting. Not doing the robe chant so that once we get it over with we can put our robe out.

[04:14]

To wear the robe chain with the feeling that it's Buddha's robe. To wear the robe chain with the feeling that it's Buddha's robe. Wholeheartedly giving and receiving. and the energy of the forms of our practice. In a general sense, the so-called Soto lineage emphasizes precision. So, to make Gassho, to bring the energy up, From the belly up into a precise point about a hand away from the tip of the nose.

[05:38]

Precise. And in general Rinzai practice is understood to emphasize energy. And I began practice with a Rinzai group. an affiliate of Edo Roshi's group and Edo Roshi had a lot of energy in his gassho which was here it wasn't as precise as it was he was a very energetic person and his gassho was extremely energetic His presence was very energetic.

[06:41]

But in the precision, we can also include our wholehearted energy. And each of the forms continuing over and over again to find ourselves. To, as best we're able, fully present that self. And then give that self away. Making room for the arising of the next self.

[07:43]

So one of the functions of ritual in practice is to make use of pauses. continually re-finding ourselves. Reconnecting with a wholeheartedness in each situation. And as we're able to do this, we really don't want to settle for anything less. Even when we're discouraged. When we're discouraged is the time to encourage one another. Maybe we don't have so much energy.

[08:46]

Can we find our wholeheartedness in that? And the chanting helps me. I've been chanting into my knees. And because I don't hear so well and bigger, she's told me not to chant so loud. Because chanting is about hearing. Chanting is not just us making a sound.

[09:48]

It's us harmonizing with one another in that moment. This is compositional space he talks about. In the recitation, it's not about that we produce a sound, but about that we harmonize with each other in the situation. And that's this compositional space, this composed space over which he speaks. I always recite in my knees. Okay, knees, you can do it. I know it doesn't feel so good, but I'm here to help you. There's a poem by Haiku poet Isa. Something like a thin frog Don't be beat. Don't be discouraged.

[10:49]

Thin, skinny frog. He says, thin frog, don't be beat. Ease is here. I kind of say this to my knees. Maybe we can say this to our back. Maybe to our cold hands. Maybe to a great pain we have in our belly. I'm here for you. Wholeheartedly here for ourselves and that way for each other. Ich bin hier für dich, aus ganzem Herzen, hier für dich und auf die Art und Weise füreinander. Ganz besonders, wenn wir uns nicht so gut fühlen.

[11:59]

Dann für uns selbst da zu sein und uns um uns selbst zu kümmern. Giving ourselves and receiving wholeheartedly. I feel practice period is really happening now. Because people are starting to talk about how somebody passes the gomasio. I don't like the way they pass the gomasio. And the way somebody may shake the ladle when they serve the salad. I don't like it when they do that. And we're starting to notice how much of our mental activity is focused on what we like and don't like.

[13:16]

What we agree with and don't agree with. And we may feel our world starting to get a little bit smaller. Our wholeheartedness may begin to slip away from us. And we may find ourselves beginning to pick certain ways to be and to choose certain ways not to be. This is really what we're supposed to be doing. Why doesn't he do that? Or, she's really such a good practitioner and I just can't begin to practice.

[14:27]

I wish I could be like her. Creating a gap between ourselves and ourselves and ourselves and each other. Creating a gap between ourselves and ourselves and ourselves and each other. So I've been feeling in the background of my practice the practice of the second foundation of mindfulness. The first foundation of mindfulness is the so-called mindfulness, or what Bekroshie calls the bodyfulness of the body. The first pillar of mindfulness is the so-called mindfulness, or as Bekaroshi says, the bodyfulness, the body... Yes.

[15:33]

Yes, so that's for the body, the body-feeling being of the body. becoming close to and inquiring into and discovering a mind that arises from the body. The second foundation is rooted in the sensation of pleasant, unpleasant and neutral. And how it so quickly may shift in us into likes and dislikes. The third is the mindfulness of mind.

[16:50]

Knowing the world is mind. And the fourth is the mindfulness of phenomena. Knowing that the world is constructs. which appear in space, and space is empty. But the second foundation of mindfulness, based in percept only, based in bare sensation, in a kind of choiceless awareness smelling, tasting, touching hearing, feeling so we have something for breakfast and we taste it

[18:12]

And it has a taste to it. And we may find that taste pleasant or we may find it not so pleasant or we may not find it either pleasant or unpleasant. Just a neutral feeling, a locatable feeling. And we find the taste maybe pleasant or unpleasant or maybe a kind of neutral feeling, neither pleasant nor unpleasant, a feeling that we cannot locate. But as we establish ourselves in this percept-only place, There's a self-present that received some food in a bowl. And the self very quickly elaborates this sensation into something that it likes or it doesn't like.

[19:35]

And then very quickly the elaboration moves from we like something or don't like something into that we're going to want more of it or we're going to try to get rid of it. And our world may begin to get narrower. It's not the world that, when we become quiet, invites the napkin, the spoon, and the white teacup. Das ist nicht die Welt, in der, wenn wir ruhig werden, wir die Serviette, die weiße Teetasse und den Löffel einladen.

[20:43]

Das ist der Geist, der es nicht mag, wie uns jemand das Gamassio gibt. And it's amazing how quickly the mind elaborates. I mentioned during the one-day sitting, I started to have some swelling in my knee. And then the horse is, we say the horse is out of the barn. It's the mind is off and running. Can I make the practice period? Can I finish it?

[21:52]

Can I get an operation here? Of course. What's that say? Of course, he said. The Atmar will take me. Except my hematologist is very important because some of you know I have hemophilia C. I'm a bleeder. And so one time, and I'm sorry you weren't there, but I almost died in a hospital from bleeding. And so one time, and I'm sorry you weren't there, but I almost died in a hospital from bleeding. So then I went into, well, so I'm going to have this operation, and even though my house, I thought I would do it in California, is seven minutes, and believe me, I know how long it takes to the hospital.

[22:56]

It takes seven minutes from my house. Gene's done this too many times with me. So they're not going to be able to stop the bleeding and I'm going to die. And then Gina said she's not going to last more than six months after I die, so Gene's going to die. But then I thought, but in our will, we're giving money to Johanneshoff. So that way we can build a Zendo. Rather have you.

[24:03]

And this process takes approximately five seconds from something as simple as some part of the body being swollen and having an unpleasant sensation All heartedness and all activity is giving ourselves completely to each activity. But this giving is what Bajang calls relinquishment. It's giving up.

[25:04]

And when he was asked, what do you mean by relinquishing? What do you mean giving up? He says, relinquishment is giving up the dual nature of right and wrong. What we like and don't like. Self and other. Here and there and in between. And as we're able to feel into this space of relinquishment of a giving, which is a kind of giving up,

[26:29]

And so weit wir in der Lage sind, in diesen Raum des sich Auflösens hineinzuspüren, was eine Art des Aufgebens ist, finden wir vielleicht, dass wir verbunden sind auf Arten und Weisen, die wir uns vorher nicht vorstellen konnten. Somebody from the outside might say that Sigmund and Bert left practice period. But I feel in the Jundo in the morning they're here. And we talk on the phone in the morning and it's a kind of telephone Jundo. And I'm glad that, Bert, you're here in the way you are now. But more significantly for us, is the wholehearted feeling and effort of taking care of one another.

[28:06]

Of the Ikkyo Roshi Ambulance. Jonas and Paul coming right after he had his colonoscopy to not be away. Oh. I didn't understand that. The... effort that Jonas and Paul made after Paul had his colonoscopy, they came back right away and were in the sender. It means the default position is this compositional space that we're shaping together.

[29:27]

Excuse me, can you say that again? Let me say something else. OK. We're continually shaping an individual space. Sometimes located in percept only. Sometimes located in a I don't like how you pass the gumashio mind. der manchmal darin verortet ist, wie ich mag nicht, wie du das Gomasio weiterreichst. And we're also at the same time located in a mutual mind that we're developing and shaping together. Und wir sind gleichzeitig verortet in einem gemeinsamen Geist, den wir miteinander formen und entwickeln. And so the effort that the wholeheartedness that we make together giving and receiving means we're not wasting time.

[30:43]

Dogen doesn't mind so much about making mistakes. But he encourages us not to waste time. Sincerely, as we're able, settling our whole heart on each moment together. I thank you very much. Vielen Dank. God bless you.

[31:58]

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