although I've been teaching for a lot of years actually, I always feel a little shy when I first meet a group of people where I don't know all of you. I actually wonder why you'd be doing this. And I also feel, you know, I've been doing this a long time. And I realize that it's a rather different way of looking at things than we usually do. And you look like very nice people. And you probably don't need any different way of looking at things.

[01:08]

So why should I burden you with this other way of looking at things? Because at the same time I enjoy it so much. I'm also quite happy to share it with you. And the title that was chosen for this weekend I think is The Miracle of Awareness and Existence. What does that sound like in German? I mean, is it fairly similar in feeling from the English word? What does it? How it sounds? Yeah, I mean, does it have the same feeling as it does in English?

[02:10]

You know, I can't tell. You can't tell, huh? She's been translating for me so much, she's lost it. No, it feels different. It's different. It's the English word. It ends more. It aims more in the English words? The English words, it doesn't express it. It explains the feeling better. Aha, that's good, I like it. Words do have an aim, that's true. I mean, they have a kind of direction built into them. And the word miracle in English, the root of it is to smile. Something that you wonder at or that makes you smile. And I was just in Ireland a few minutes ago. And One thing I noticed in Ireland is that I went out jogging and walking around and wandering on the beach.

[03:39]

And I'm a rather strange-looking fellow. For most people, anyway. When I first went into this house of this friend where I was staying, I don't like to wear shoes in the house, so I took my shoes off. And this little three-year-old boy named Nicholas, first thing he said, you lost your shoe, lost your hair. And he kept the whole time I was there. He kept wondering about this problem. And he finally found my shoes. But he didn't find my hair. And when I left, he was still asking me as I drove off, where is your hand?

[04:59]

So we spent quite a bit of time. He put his hand on my head, and I put my hand on his head. And for, you know, several minutes at a time, at a time we'd sit and look at each other. Yeah. And when I went out on the street and on the beach, as I said, the kids immediately smiled at me, which is actually unusual. And I asked, would the kids be walking either by themselves or with their parents? And I'd say hello and they'd smile and say hello. And in most countries they don't do that. The kids don't. I feel in most countries, and I've been in lots of them recently, and I like kids.

[06:04]

So I always am talking to them. And they either react with the feeling that they were told not to talk to people who look strange. Or taught or not, they just think I look strange. But in Ireland, the kids just didn't seem to care. I was as curious as a dog barking at the waves on the beach. And it made me think that maybe Ireland as they claim to be is still a land where the spirit or innocence is protected in some way. And I feel that one of the reasons behind the great success of Japan in our contemporary world

[07:14]

is that much more than is obvious to us, and even taking into consideration some of the negative sides of Japanese culture, they've developed a culture which simultaneously allows them to protect the spirit. And it gives them a kind of reserve power or integrity in their life that often I think most people lack. And it's partly a willingness to be innocent. A willingness to smile at things or be surprised by things. Did you say it's hardly a willingness? Hardly. To be surprised at things or to smile at things.

[08:40]

I remember I was hiking in the Sierra Mountains when I was 25 or 26 years old. We were up pretty high, I think 10,000 or 12,000 feet, which is what, 2,000 or more than 3,000 meters. And I was with two friends, both artists. And we were surrounded by these great peaks. And they asked me, what is the, what characteristic, what are the conditions for Zen practice?

[10:10]

And I thought for a little bit and I said, sincerity. And they cracked up. They just started laughing. But they thought I was sort of naive or silly or something. To talk about sincerity. So I actually think we all have that problem. by being a little too sophisticated or find it difficult to look at what I call the realm of the obvious. Okay, well that's enough for that little bit.

[11:22]

So I'd like to ask you some questions. How many of you have had no experience with meditation or very little? Okay, good. Okay, okay. All right, thanks. And I think you'll find that it looks like the majority have had some experience. So I think you'll find that the experience of the others helps you to sit. So I have to give, but for those of you who don't have experience sitting, I'll have to give some instruction to all of you. And I think that for those of you who've heard meditation instruction many times, please be patient.

[12:35]

Anyway, the main... about the posture is the posture of your backbone. Actually, you can think of your backbone as a kind of mind so that And the quality of the mind of your backbone has to do with its posture. And our back is the repository of much of our emotional experience. And so that's why when someone gets a massage, it almost always starts with the back.

[13:40]

Or if somebody walks up behind you while you're sitting in a chair in a restaurant or something. And they squeeze your shoulders here. You'll let out a little scream of pain or pleasure. Because a lot's going on in your back. And it's waiting for someone to walk by and squeeze it. And usually we pay least attention to what we can't see. We pay attention to the front of something and not the back.

[15:05]

So when you sit you want to drop the sense of seeing yourself or being an observer of yourself. Do you want to feel yourself from inside as if you could see 360 degrees. And the main secret of that is a feeling of aliveness in your backbone. And in yogic culture, Buddhism is a is a yogic culture. States of mind, thoughts are not so important.

[16:05]

Just drop states of mind. And thoughts are important in so far as they are parts of states of mind. And states of mind are characterized by energy and heat. And in Buddhism, heat and consciousness are closely connected as words. Your connection to the energy of your mind and body is primarily established through your backbone.

[17:22]

And so the feeling and posture and awareness of your backbone is the most important part of your meditation practice. Thank you for translating so well. It seems like she's translating well anyway. With me. So first of all, you want to take care of your backbone all the time. You want to see if you can feel in your backbone, in your back as a whole, a kind of pliancy and receptivity.

[18:25]

Almost as if you could imagine the wind passing through your back. Or your back supported not just your body, but the space around you. I'm speaking this way because the larger attitudes you have influence and support the particulars of any posture instructions I give you. So again, you want to sit with as much altitude under your bottom as you can.

[19:39]

With as much altitude as allows your back to be straight easily. And then the leg posture is secondary, is next. So I used to sit, as I many times told some of you, with three cushions. And it was always a balancing act. And I would slowly slide off. But sitting on a chair is okay, too. Or one of these little meditation benches. And I should say again to those of you who don't have experience, you can sit this way as well.

[20:39]

And this allows your back to be quite straight. Or you can sit this way. Now, when you're sitting in that posture, and you lift up through your back, Or you can reach the floor pushing down with your hands. Like this. If you push up like that and then let your back down, that's more or less the posture you want to aim for. That's more or less the posture you want to aim for. Actually, when we sit, there's a dialogue between the ideal posture and the actual posture you have. And that dialogue is very important. I think it might be better to have bad posture to start with because the dialogue is worth it.

[22:04]

Does that make sense? Do you understand? So you're actually trying to do two things at once. You're trying to sit in such a way that you can have an easy, lifting feeling through your back and through the back of your neck and a feeling that you are being lifted from here or lifted from here. And at the same time, you're accepting whatever posture you have. You're not criticizing your posture, this is not good. I wish I had better posture.

[23:05]

That's not a helpful way to think. So you just say, look at me, I'm funny looking. Maybe you should laugh about it a little. I have a friend who's in Ireland who was been one of the real influences on social thinking in Ireland. But he's tired of doing it for so many years and not having any money. His line is, I've been saving the world and now I need to save myself. So he's trying to pretend to be a businessman.

[24:14]

And he's combing his hair forward to hide his balls. And wearing a suit. And I was quite hard with him this morning when he took me to the airport. Hard on him. because he was asking me advice and I said you look like a fake and I pushed his hair back I probably shouldn't have done that but I said look at me He said, thanks. But I said, you don't have to shave your head, just don't.

[25:21]

So I said, you're just me, 45. And I told him the story about Red Skelton. When he was about, I don't know, 79 or 80, he gave a lecture, a talk on television. He's a comedian in the United States. Red Skelton? Red Skelton. It's skeleton. I used to think that when I was a kid. He said there are three ages of man. He was getting an award.

[26:27]

Accepting it, he said, there are three ages of man. Youth. Middle age. And you're looking good. So now when people see me, Baker Roshi, you're looking good, actually. But you have to have that feeling when you go, oh, no, I'm looking good. With that kind of feeling, you just accept your posture. And your tongue goes at the root of your mouth. And there are reasons for all this, but, you know, if you want, I'll explain, but... I think you have to understand that this yogic culture comes from a culture which also...

[27:39]

produced the understanding of the body that we call acupuncture. And a small difference, putting a needle here or here, is a big difference. So where your tongue is, how your hands are, are like they're as subtle as acupuncture points. Doesn't mean one way is better than another exactly. But it means that everything you do, whatever it is, it's different is different. Can I tell the story of your toe?

[28:53]

I'm going to tell the story of her toe. And you can correct me, because I probably got it mixed up, but it's your story. David and were in a car accident recently. Quite serious car accident. And she has a quite bad scar that runs from here up into her hair. And I guess it was thought it would lead to quite a bad scar. And you went to an acupuncture, is that right? No? No, I just, a friend gave me an acupuncture on the foot. And he's here. Oh, he's here? And he touched one side of her toe, and he said it's like a textbook or something.

[30:01]

And he touched a certain tooth, and he said it's really like a textbook. And it gave you pain right here immediately. The toe was painful. The toe was painful, not your head. I see. Your toe was painful. So she massaged... And that part of the toe is related to this part of the head. So she massaged her toe. And although there may be no relationship between the fat, and then her cut healed very fast, and so it's nearly invisible. There may be no connection, but there may be. In any case, in this kind of yogic posture, it's assumed that there's a connection.

[31:14]

And there are pictures of bodhisattvas sitting, for instance, with their hand behind their ear. And it looks like they're listening. But actually they're pressing certain acupuncture points. So we're trying to in this kind of sitting create the opportunity so that you can know yourself from inside. And when I say inside, I always have to, I think I should say inside so that pretty soon everything is inside. You'll find that the usual distinction of inside and outside isn't present anymore as your meditation practice develops. Okay.

[32:25]

This is a very slow meditation instruction. But again, the main thing is the posture of your back and this lifting feeling. which helps your, which this lifting feeling is connected to the feeling of energy and heat in the body. At the same time you imagine a kind of maybe butter melting down through you. There's a kind of softness in that. Right now you can feel the way in which your eyelids are on your eyeball.

[33:28]

And there's a kind of softness in that. And when your meditation is good, that kind of softness that you feel between your eye and your eyelid is throughout your body. and then your hands we usually put our hands together your left hand on top of your right hand and your fingers overlapping but not up into the palm and then your thumbs touching lightly and again with a kind of lifting feeling in the thumbs lifting up a little curve and then just rest your hands comfortably now you can just put your hands together any old way you like

[34:45]

And you can experiment with it as you like. But this preciseness is probably the best basic posture. And you can sit with your hands on your knees too. But that's quite different posture. The energy flows in your body differently when your hands are on your knees. And it's good though, but it's different. So just now for a few minutes I'd like us to sit in whatever posture you're in or whatever place you're in and I'll ring the bell three times to begin the sitting and one stand it

[35:58]

And during this seminar today and Saturday and Sunday we'll sit some formal periods and some informal periods and some longer periods and some short periods and sometimes maybe just for a few minutes. just so that we get familiar with moving into the discussion and back into meditation and so forth. Find yourself present in your breathing. This kind of attitude is at the basis of Buddhist practice and all the development and evolution of practice through all the yogic states and the cosmic conceptions of a cosmic Buddha

[37:19]

It begins with a simple kind of feeling of washing the dishes, of just how you're sitting, of finding yourself present in your breathing. And the genius or power of practice is found by people who do things thoroughly And very simple things thoroughly. Without rushing. So if I say, trust how you are just now. You'll be able to sense the ways in which you can't or don't. And if I come back to Heidelberg next year, probably that would be enough to keep you busy between now and next year.

[38:52]

If you really could sort of innocently, thoroughly explore trusting how you are just now you'd probably be in pretty good shape next year. Probably better shape than you are now. Although you look just fine to me. But between now and a year from now, But during today and next year with such a simple practice you would probably go through some kind of scary, maybe terrible times. Because such a simple practice can challenge everything. And if you try to find your own resources to come closer to trusting just how you are, there's a Zen story in which a roshi is asked something about enlightenment or Buddha.

[40:13]

I don't remember the story exactly but he answers I'm always close to this so if I could ask you a year from now do you trust how you are just now It would be lovely if you could answer, I'm always close to this. And you could find that when you're not doing anything. Like this weekend, we have no agenda other than being alive. But you could also find this feeling in whatever you're doing as your regular activity.

[41:31]

If I stopped you at any moment, between now and next year, as you're walking on the sidewalk or in an elevator or talking to someone, If you could feel me like a little guardian angel appear. And say, do you trust how you are just now? And you could feel your feet just as you were standing. And you could feel the length of your backbone. and your presence in your breath. And you could turn to me without interrupting the conversation with your friend.

[42:32]

Or say, and say, I hope. Or sometimes, I'm always close to this. So that kind of feeling or those kinds of attitudes which we can feel at ease with are the kind of field of practice which allows your concentration or zazen to really work and allows your breathing to reach throughout your body. to your knees and throughout your skin to the tips of your toes and the soles of your feet the tips of your fingers really and in your ears tips of your ears and in your cheekbones these are all areas of consciousness

[43:48]

A consciousness which at an energetic level is the quality of your thoughts and moods and emotions. Anyway, this is how Buddhism understands our human life. And this miracle, really miracle of our own existence That we can smile at.

[44:17]

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