Since Andreas Vormann isn't here, it has to be one of them. He's always first, so sometimes I have to say you can only be second. I started our discussion with That I obviously don't formulate my practice in the manner of questioning, having questions. You don't? You mean you had a group or you didn't? It's not my intention to do that. I ask myself, how do I get there?

[01:05]

It's not my intention to do so. Now I ask myself. I think I have questions, but they don't seem to be formulated in my practice. How do I get there? How do I get my awareness as a question? I have questions in my practice, but they don't appear as questions in my practice. So how can I develop myself that the state of being I can put into questions? Well, I think that there's always questions implicit in practice. Yeah, I mean, why sit down and practice instead of playing the saxophone?

[02:11]

When you sit down, you're answering that question. When you play the saxophone, you're answering the question the other way. Impossible, I think, that there aren't implicit questions in practice. So then the question is, is it useful to make them explicit? Yeah, I think Zen practice is, the fabric of Zen practice assumes a process of questioning. I think Heidegger would say that real thinking isn't possible that doesn't evolve through a process of questioning. And I mention him because his... even without practice, where he came to is quite similar to Buddhism.

[03:40]

To some aspects. But that's not just true of him as an aside. It's true of many Western philosophers and others who... come to a point where they needed practice to go the next step. You can feel it in Wittgenstein and others. So, I don't know, I'll have to think about, maybe. What's the... how one makes, if one, what's the process of making questions explicit and how it is useful to do so. What about the discussion of others? Maybe since it's such a small number here, everyone can speak for themselves.

[04:44]

Especially those who haven't said anything. Don't look away. Sorry. We felt in our group that it is kind of an effort to formulate a question. And when you come up with a question, you sense already that there is an implicit answer within the question.

[06:00]

Already. That's true, I think. Yes, I think that's true. My question is that I suffer from the fact that So my question is, when I come to an insight through meditation, I suffer from not being able to do it in daily life or something to... When you come to a... What in meditation? An insight. An insight? Yeah, an insight. You have an insight through meditating and then... I recognize I do this and that wrong in my life and I would like to change it but I don't change it.

[07:07]

Why do I see and don't act upon it? Or don't act? The answer is easy. The seeing of the problem or whatever it is, is not the mind that acts. So you have to take the seeing and turn it into an intention which then begins to penetrate the mind that acts. So I think the idea of questioning, the other side of the coin of questioning is intention. And I think I probably should speak about that more before we end today.

[08:48]

I mean, if you just take a... Like what this, the phrase, the koan, this seminar phrase is based on, the golden wind. I mean, when the tree withers and Leaves fall. What is this? Of course, that's a question.

[09:48]

But if you want to practice with it, you have to ask, first question is, why did he say this? And the second question being, would I say this? Would I ask this question? And if I ask this question, would I say it this way? Yeah, there's a Christian statement that's quite similar. Da gibt es eine christliche Aussage, die sehr ähnlich ist. I think it's when the tree witherest, withers. Wenn der Baum verwelkt. In the Bible it says. When the tree withereth and the flower fadeth. Also wenn der Baum welkt und die Blume dahin welkt.

[10:49]

Yeah, there you can really hear those words. Someone said to me once that lots of German words are leased or rented out to Christianity. They're rented to the Lord. And so it's hard, so people said sometimes it's easier to do Buddhism in English. But when I say the flower fadeth and the tree withereth, then they're rented out to the Bible. Yeah. And then it says, but the word of the Lord abideth forever. Well, that's almost, conceptually, it's the same statement. When the tree withers and the leaves fall, and then

[11:57]

And then Janmen says, the body exposed in the golden wind. How is that similar to, and yet the word of the Lord abideth forever? If we did no more than look at those two statements, independent of whether they're Buddhist or Christian, the response to the world changing and impermanent and dying, one is The word of the Lord abides forever and the other is the body exposed in the golden wind.

[13:19]

So to get inside any of these things, you have to try them on yourself and say, would I say that? Would I have answered the golden wind or the body, etc. ? And if I did say that, what would I mean? In this process of questioning, you can approach maybe what young men meant. Und in dieser Art von Frage kann man sich vielleicht dem annähern, was young men gemeint haben. But you first have to plant it, root it, in your own situation. Aber zuerst musst du es in deiner eigenen Situation verankern. If you just try to understand it abstractly, you sort of get nowhere. Then koans are riddles. Und wenn du das versuchst, abstrakt irgendwie zu verstehen, dann gerätst du nirgendwo hin, dann bleibt ein koan ein Rätsel.

[14:32]

So I would say that if you have some insight or, let's say, you make that your intention, you don't so much try to do it. You just make it your intention to do it. And you hold that intention. And that intention will... find its way into your actions. This is one of the very basic, as basic as you can be, I could say techniques of Zen Buddhism. But if it's a technique, it's rooted in Buddhist understanding of the way the mind and body work.

[15:34]

Anyway, thank you. So, someone else? Everyone else. I have a very simple question that is with me but not in a dramatic way. And the question is, how can I stop wishing? Because I'm convinced to be a living human being and to wish is connected and belongs together. But I have made the experience when I'm so to speak happy without any wishes then I can be very happy.

[16:50]

What do you mean by wish? Like I wish I wasn't bald? Meinst du zum Beispiel, ich wünschte, ich wäre nicht glatzköpfig? Nein, sowas nicht. I have that wish now on the ear. Manchmal habe ich diesen Wunsch. Nein, es gibt Wünsche, große Reisen zu machen. A wish to go on a big journey, to travel. Oh, ja. To maybe paint. Or have a girlfriend, living alone.

[17:51]

Too many couples in this group. Yeah, okay, I understand. Well, I'll see. I want to speak about the material stream of life.

[18:55]

Yeah, and if I can speak to that, maybe I can speak to what you're saying, because I have dealt with this same problem myself. I'm planning to start painting tomorrow. But I'm in a traffic jam in a bus. I can't find my paints. You know, I can't resist repeating this, mentioning the sign I saw outside of Münster, where there was always a stow for years. Somebody had written on an empty billboard,

[19:56]

You think you're in a stow, but you are the stow. It's one of the most profound statements I know. Well, outside a Protestant church in America, they have these little marquees like they were a movie. You know, a movie was going to happen on Sunday, you know, letters they put on the marquee. And Marie Louise, my wife, when she first came to America, So all these identical little churches in Colorado towns, and she asked me, do you Americans get your churches out of catalogs too?

[21:06]

Anyway, maybe we do, but... But anyway, one of these signs said, if you're waiting for a sign from God, this is it. Okay, who's next? Joris? I thought I didn't have a question and I said to the group no I don't have a question And my theme in my life is more, what is the focus in my life?

[22:20]

And then I realized it is a question. Yeah. And I didn't realize that. If you realize it, And then you turn that question into an intention. There's a tremendous power in that. Whether it's a power to find the focus or to realize the focus you already have. One can have an intention just to find a question. Okay, who's next? My question was, how do I recognize this trust in my body?

[23:35]

How do you recognize the trust in your body? How do I know that I have it, when I have it, or if I have it? Well, I can only say in Deutsch, but... Yeah, and the answer is the same really in this. You make it an intention. And I mean that's the center of the craft of Zen practice is to make question into an intention. Okay.

[24:37]

Can you say something? Okay. One of my main questions is how I can get in contact with other people, how I can get in touch with other people. I have a very quick and direct way to connect with other people. I have very easily a connection with animals. And with people, I recognize that I have a tendency to withdraw more easily, and my question is, how can I work with that?

[25:54]

It is interesting that we can feel connected with animals, babies, person coming out of the forest to rescue us. But in ordinary circumstances we often feel some sort of glass wall or something between us and others. Yeah, how do we do something about that? I won't forget. One reason I come to seminars is because I'm somehow dependent on you and on the others to see the world differently. To see the world... You know, the other way.

[27:00]

Yeah. Or more as it is. Yeah. And my question is, how can I do it on my own in my everyday life to see the same situation, to see the potential in the moment? I guess I have no answer. Yes, okay. Do you want to say something in German? One reason why I always come to seminars is because I'm kind of dependent on Roshi and what he says and from the Sanna, from the people, because I can have a different view of the world here. and more than I think it is. And my question is, how can I in my everyday life see the situation more than this potential in the given situation and the obstacles that I know of?

[28:18]

So how do I do that? That was good. I can be your disciple now. Yeah. Yuan Wu, who I always introduce as one of the most trustworthy authorities in Zen Buddhism, said something I've been introducing the last couple of years. Once you have understood and realized the gist of the teaching, Wenn du einmal den Kern und den Geist der Belehrungen verwirklicht hast, verstanden und verwirklicht hast, then concentrate continuously without breaks and allow the womb of sagehood und erlaube den Schoß der Weisheit

[29:52]

Well, let's say the embryo of sageshood to develop and mature. Okay. So I think if you tried to concentrate continuously, the questions would be there. Right away you have the question, why can't I? Then you have the question, what kind of concentration must he mean? It's not like concentrating on a book or concentrating on writing something. Because that's not possible to do continuously. So what kind of concentration must he mean? Then do I already have such a concentration? In fact, you do. We are all concentrated continuously on our posture. It's not a conscious concentration, but it's an intention that manifests in an awareness of our body at all times.

[31:19]

As long as you're awake, you usually know what posture your body's in, unless you're quite drunk. Which we hope is an uncommon occurrence. And even during the night, We have an awareness of our body posture on the side or back. Yeah, so if that's an example of concentration, what other ways can I bring concentration continuously into my life? By the way, this statement of Yuan Wu's is almost exactly the same as the body exposed in the golden wind. I have been very destructive in the group yesterday and I want to apologize to the group for that.

[32:57]

I said almost all questions that I'm dealing with are not worth to be put out as questions. And the background of the statement is that my professional situation is not in There were times when I thought that my practice would help me to accept this, and one might also think that if I learn to sit without acting I can also be in a situation in my life without having to change anything.

[34:33]

And I thought that maybe my practice would help me to accept that, that if I can sit without acting, maybe I could sit in my life without having the need to change anything in my life. And then you realize that the power is probably still missing. And if I now formulate a question, it is probably the question But then the strength lessens, and so my question would be today, Where do I have to admit that I don't have the strength to let that be as it is without it being harmful to me? Yeah, I think I understand your dilemma.

[36:09]

The first question I'd ask is, why do you think your questions aren't worth being put out there? I mean, aside from whether they're worth it or not, why think that? But then what you actually said is at the center of the Eightfold Path. We can think of all of Buddhism rests on this first teaching of the Buddha. Right or completing views. Right or completing or perfecting intentions. Right or completing speech. Behavior. Livelihood. And then... energy, vitality and meditation and concentration.

[37:33]

And probing the Eightfold Path and how these work together and support each other. Is at the center and beginning of Buddhist practice. And it's not so much a question of changing anything, but working with the questions you have that arise through the Eightfold Path. So that's enough for now to say. Yesterday I wasn't able to say one important question. That's the same thing he said.

[38:45]

No, not because I thought it wasn't worth the same. I just couldn't think of one. And then I thought, okay, a lot of legal questions, they can't go along my rules. They don't have any questions at all. And then I... I think I thought maybe it's not so important. I asked the question, is it important to have an important question? Probably only not to be too disappointed about myself. But I think it would be a great answer to this question. But it probably is important to have an important question transformed into this attention. I tried to think that one over. In German, please. Yesterday, when I came to the office, I had a question that was not important to me.

[39:51]

I had so many small questions. I enjoyed my voice in everyday life. And then I wanted to say to myself, not to be deceived, that it is important to have a question. But now I have received an answer. Well, I would guess that the little questions aren't so little. You don't need a big important question. You just know the little question you pay attention to. Pay important attention to little questions.

[41:01]

I find myself that my practice is always being shaped by a question. And I sometimes make it explicit and mostly I don't anymore. But if I stop, I would say that every two or three weeks, something like that, is a slightly different, very different or slightly different question motivating how I bring attention to the world. How I bring The motivation with which I bring attention to the world.

[42:15]

David? I found the destructive part from Alex very inspiring. Because it led me to the question, from what state of mind do we ask questions? Do I ask questions? There are different state of minds from which we put forth questions. And those questions that we think are important to us. And I for myself find that important questions arise in the context of practice.

[43:35]

That hasn't always been so. And the question that I'm with right now is what is the foundation of my breath or what is breath in itself? And that I realize that this question can't be answered really. And that I realize that this question And although the question is still out there, the content of the question is not so important to me anymore. But the question remains, it's still there. The question that is related to that is how am I going to continue to practice with that?

[44:59]

There's a Zen saying, the eye can't grasp the eye. And the hand can't grasp the hand. And the mind can't grasp the mind. Maybe the breath can't grasp the breath. But somehow if you have an intention to grasp or understand or something the breath Perhaps no understanding arises. But your breathing may change. Although the eye can't see the eye, if you really study your perception, Notice you're seeing.

[46:16]

Sometimes we start to see differently. It's time to take a break. Let's do that. Oh, no, I forgot. I'm really confused now. Maybe I'll start with myself right now. What's my motivation to be here in the first place? And the biggest problem I think I have is that I can't forgive myself and others.

[47:17]

And the weakness is continuously put forth over and over again and becomes a real problem. And I'm looking for a way, how can I learn that, how can I develop that, to put that forth, to change that. How to forgive myself and others. How to apply that, how can I do that. Let me just say that I agree with James Hillman who has said that you can't forgive in a vacuum.

[48:35]

Forgiveness is by the nature of forgiveness requires mutuality, requires the people involved to be, there has to be some mutuality to the forgiveness. You can't forgive by yourself. So I would start by feeling that maybe I just have to accept that there won't be forgiveness. And then, in regard to what you say, forgiving yourself, in my experience, it starts with accepting oneself. with or without forgiveness, but accepting oneself.

[49:47]

And then from that acceptance, starting to act in the world. And of course Buddhism isn't involved with guilt. It's involved with shame. In other words, one can be ashamed of how we've acted. But then if we try to not act that way anymore, the shame disappears. But if you are in a guilt culture, no matter what you do, the guilt sticks to you. And that's a different concept of time, a different concept of space and time. But again, now it's space for, I mean time for Oh, somebody told on you.

[50:51]

After the break? After the break, yes. Clever, right? Oh, I forgot somebody else, too. After the break.

[50:59]

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