I have no idea what she's doing. Or you begin to feel a little rubber ball of space in your hands. A round gummy ball in your hands, yeah. Do you know what I mean? You can feel almost like a kind of space in your hands. Or between your thumbs, this kind of. We call that mind arising in your hands. So it makes sense? Mind arises in your hand. Well, when you look at the cheese in the morning, and you just look at it, and you don't yet have the associations and thoughts, et cetera, But the fullness of your attention is in just seeing the cheese or the flour.

[01:08]

We can say in a way that mind arises at the breakfast table. Sounds like a New York play or something. Mind arising at the breakfast table. So, this is also what's meant by the form skanda. So we could say that that in a way, if you practice, everything is settling down here.

[02:11]

Pretty soon everything settles. Everything is settling down here. So when you're practicing zazen, one thing you're doing is in a sense returning everything to the form skanda. You're not getting rid of your thoughts. You're letting your thoughts settle into feelings. And then the feelings settle into the physicalness of you. And then the physicalness of you is infused by mind. And then thoughts arise out of that mind physicalness. And then during the day, the more you can feel that and return to that through your breath or your way of looking and acting, you're very stable.

[03:33]

You're right where you are. No one can move you. We also call that iron man. Iron woman. That's Margaret Thatcher. Yeah. And this sense of infusing of settling everything into the form skanda, into the lake, out of the waves, and out of the boats, to the still, deep part of ocean or lake. That feeling begins to extend to your environment.

[04:35]

Extends to your friend. And to just your office or wherever you are. So the feeling then comes into waves or boats and settles again. Now there's lots of ways that's expressed. Excuse me? There's lots of ways that's expressed. This whole thing is expressed. There are a lot of ways this whole thing is expressed. Now the basic symbol of Buddhism is the lotus.

[06:13]

It's sort of equivalent to the cross in Christianity. Actually, what's also similar to the cross in Christianity is the swastika. And the cross is, of course, the meeting of two points. But since everything moves in Buddhism, you just don't have the meeting of two points, you have the turning. And it's understood to turn both ways. Oops. So the swastika, and Hitler actually got the swastika from some Tibetan guy, et cetera, from Buddhism.

[07:17]

So the Native American Indians in America also use the swastika. And I think it's understood to be quite likely now that American Indians are originally an Asian culture that came across from Alaska. So the sense of a mandala or a point that moves in and out is another basic symbol of Buddhism. So maybe you guys will bring true meaning of the swastika to Germany. Okay, so this is the lotus. Picasso, I'm going to write down here. I mean Picasso. Picasso. Okay, so this is sometimes called the mud seal, the water seal, and the space seal.

[08:30]

And now I think we need a break. Okay. I thought it would be nice for you to have some flowers of direct perception.

[10:49]

Now, one thing that we always do is we always are concerned about what other people think and how other people think. It's only natural. We're born of other people. but how to practice you need to find also a place where you can kind of rest where you really don't care what anyone thinks and where you're really content to be alone

[12:03]

And not wonder whether anybody else feels this way or not. Or anybody else ever knows you feel this way. You can be enlightened in such a place. Just because you don't care, anybody knows. This is part of what's meant by no gaining idea or no idea of attaining enlightenment. And to come to this place where you don't really need anyone else to know what's happening to you is also paradoxically the place where you can hear your inner teacher and hear the world speak to you. So generally, when you can hear in the world, the world view, your culture is, the voice of your culture is built in.

[13:50]

And here, your primary process is the main way in which your consensual reality operates. So example, the primary process here is we all agree to be here, to pay attention and try to understand. And we're friendly to each other. And then in the secondary process, you may be thinking, I can't ever understand this. Or it may be built into your personality, the fact that you always understand. And here you like some people or are attracted to some people or you dislike other people.

[15:12]

But all of these are very involved with what other people think and what you think and what they don't know you're thinking and so forth. No, it's obvious that it would be nice to be in a place where you're not so concerned with such things. But that's not just a moral place. It's a place where a different kind of flower can grow. So it's some place in here which isn't concerned with so much these other things. And then if you really can be there, it actually begins to make a big circle which includes all of these things. So if we imagine that the self is a boat.

[16:19]

You're in the boat. And you don't actually have much connection with the water. Now the five skandhas is not the self and it's more like an inner tube. Most of your body is actually in the water and you're holding onto the inner tube. But you can't really see in the water. So it'd be nice also to abandon the five skandhas. So the Heart Sutra says the five skandhas are also empty. But the first step is still keeping the five skandhas in view. Which means from the boat of the self, you can see the inner tube floating out there.

[17:24]

And it's like when you hear an object, you're aware that that object is being heard within the realm of your hearing. So you're not just hearing music or sound. You're hearing the music of your own hearing for that sound is arising within your hearing. That's keeping the five skynas in view. So likewise, when I see these flowers, I see the flowers arising within my own seeing, and I see it blooming as a feeling and a perception. And that's keeping the five skandhas in view while I'm seeing the flower.

[18:43]

And likewise, I see each of you blooming. Okay, so let's float the inner tube over to the lotus. Now, the lotus is, as I said earlier, a symbol of Buddhism because its roots are in the mud and its blossom is up in the air. And even when water falls on their big leaves, it rolls up in little balls. It doesn't set up. So it fills up with water, these little pearls of water, and then it dumps it onto the leaf below. So it's of the water, but not in the water. But it's also in the water.

[19:58]

And it's... So, it's also in the water, yeah? And it's also in the mud. So, the flower is not only in the water, but also in the mud. Now, some people practice because we don't understand the yogic side of practice. We don't understand the yogic side. And we're afraid of our personality in the world. We practice too much up here. You cut the lotus off, actually. And it sounds like that's what happened to you.

[21:03]

Too much up here. So we talk about this as, as I said, the space seal, the water seal, and the mud seal. And it doesn't just mean be the roots, but be in the mud. So sometimes it's critical. In a koan it will say, he's in the weeds or he's in the mud. And it means he's ignorant or unenlightened or doesn't know that everything is empty or something. But sometimes we say he's in the mud or he's in the weeds because he's enlightened.

[22:04]

And enlightened means that he also is in the mud. So in that sense, we call this the Nirmanakaya Buddha. The Nirmanakaya Buddha is your teaching manifesting in the weeds and ordinary details of life. This is called the Dharmakaya Buddha. It means the understanding where everything is empty or space. And there's an actual experience of things with no boundaries. And everything interpenetrates without interfering with each other. That's the actual state of the world. Sort of like at an atomic level.

[23:04]

And this is more like at a molecular level where everything is separated into separate elements. And that's also the actual state of the world. Now this is called the Sambhogakaya Buddha. Or the instructional body of the Buddha. The stem. And that's the water seal. And it's thought to be realized you need to know and exist fully in to be sealed by the mud, sealed by the water and to be sealed by space. Otherwise you kill the flower. You don't really know the flower. When you know this, you can get out of your inner tube and be in the mud and the water and the flower.

[24:16]

And the flower and space are the same. Sometimes it looks like a flower and sometimes it's space. So this is Zazen. And it's often associated with bliss or enjoyment. Because in Buddhism, there's no rule book. There's no Bible. There's no world out there which instructs you. Only the world in here instructs you. And this also represents your backbone. As this represents your backbone.

[25:21]

They always put a slight curve to these sticks, so it's your backbone. So when you enter your backbone, and this also means your chakras, your inner channel, a deep kind of bliss or ease or satisfaction arises, which isn't an ordinary enjoyment about likes and dislikes. And this deep enjoyment instructs you. It instructs you how you move down the roots into the world and how the world is born out of this stem and how the flower is born out of this stem. So zazen is really to develop this, so this and this happen.

[26:35]

But the stem also will be dead that doesn't have this and this. Do you understand? That's the idea anyway. And that's the experience actually, Tim. It's also a bridge, yes. These are... I like it. Makes me want to swim. I keep looking at this face.

[27:37]

I know. He's got his eye on the stem. By the way, did we ask somebody to make a reservation at the restaurant? OK. Well, we did. So practicing the five skandhas or practicing microclimates, you begin to see the possibility through the microclimates of the stem.

[28:37]

Because if you don't know be able to see, feel yourself in these more tiny and the actual present, the actual territory of your life. You only see the pond or you see the blossom. But you don't feel the water all around you. And you don't feel how the stem lives in the water. So the sense of zazen again is to find out how this stem lives in the water. It's literally like you find the stem of yourself in practice.

[29:39]

And all these things, the five skandhas and zazen, all lead to this stem. But when you really know this stem, you can let go, abandon the five skandhas. We say it's beyond meditation, you abandon practice. The stem, the path itself is you. But in actual fact, sometimes the blossoms, sometimes the stems forms the mud, and sometimes we abandon it. And all those, these roots down here, may not know about this. But actually, we mean when we say people are already enlightened, we mean they're the root, they just don't know about the rest of the plant.

[30:56]

But when the root becomes aware of the whole plant, Tremendous amount of energy and awareness comes from the flower into the roots and from the roots up into the flower. Okay. Now I'd like to see if we have time to pass the stick a little bit more because it's fun to hold. Okay.

[31:58]

Yes, but I also live in these two countries quite a lot. Not at home. I just got one question. Actually, I've been there for two days now, where I don't know exactly where to put it, because I don't want to ask the right answer. I think it's better than being a model. [...] The question is, how can I develop more of this will and more of this intention?

[33:19]

I don't know. I don't know exactly what it is. I have a question. In order to practice I need some volition and intent and I have this battle inside me and somehow I feel I have to strengthen this dimension of volition and intent in order to practice. I don't know how to explain it.

[34:21]

I don't know how to explain it. [...] And at the same time, I have the opportunity to talk to you and hope that I can make you aware of what you are doing. I would like to ask you to be aware of what you are doing. I would like to ask you to be aware of what you are doing. I would like to ask you to be aware of what you are doing. This question stayed with me.

[35:34]

In which world do I look in your body and mind? And it's staying with me. On one hand I feel something is urging you to practice with a koan. On the other hand, there's something telling me I feel uncomfortable. So I'm kind of in the midst of all this, but I feel very well. If there's something you want to say in English, she'll have time. Well, I used to, before I was an abuse hero, Thank you. Can you count on me?

[38:40]

I'll do it. Oh, you never shut up. You have to stand up strong. It means that I am involved in the object of the future.

[39:56]

Okay. Okay. It's wonderful to have to hold this bath.

[41:56]

It's wonderful to have to be told the right thing to do. When I'm in a spa, I don't think I will bring it back. It's really, I love it. Just that feeling. It's a very question I don't know where to start, but my main question is, when is it good to start practicing in a choir? And then with the choirs, it also gives me a very similar feeling.

[42:59]

And then with the choirs, it gives me a very similar feeling. And then with the choirs, it gives me a very similar feeling. I've been very grateful for the repetition of the five skandhas, more than if you watch Kira, and now I'm just simply floating around with my consciousness, and I really do like them. I work with them and they inspire me like a cactus. And I also have a question for you. Like I picked up the last machine and I kept working on it, but then I drop it again and then I work on it again, so my thing is how to proceed.

[44:02]

Maybe my question is that I ask myself, I mean, what do I take home from here? On one hand, I feel like I'm gaining, but on the other hand, I'm losing everything here, so maybe both is right. Thank you.

[47:06]

I know one thing I take with me from here is to feel the lightness and to have more fun and have fun. And I noticed that this morning at breakfast when I decapitated my egg, everything was so wonderful. It's really kind of quickly turned by all the expectations about Zen in my former context set upside down, which I always experienced with Richie and Vivi and so forth. So I'm very happy, very pleased. Well, I see a black young horse just in, a black young horse.

[48:49]

and that is walking over a lake of diamonds and jewels, and you get a dark blue sky in the background. And this is the... It sounds a little bit English to me. And you're bright. The staff is so bright. In our image, what is seen is the content and the small conclusions.

[49:50]

It's official. Holy fuck. I was up straight here, my ass. I forget. What would you like?

[51:03]

You read them. Yes. I can't think of anything. I can't think of anything. I realized in the second hour a lot of the things that are inside me are absent from the reality to threaten my personality very much better than being threatened more with a lot of fear.

[52:21]

I feel I'm okay. It's a good experience. My intellect outside. I think I doubt my intellect, I must say. Thank you very much.

[53:48]

I would like to thank you very much. I would like to thank you very much. I would like to thank you very much. I want to thank you. Yeah. But sometimes the pain was so bad that they were tickling me badly when I prayed for the bell.

[54:50]

I've heard. One thing I've observed is my skin, my face relaxed, and that was a really wonderful experience. I feel I've entered a path I want to stay. It won't hurt. It won't hurt. It won't hurt. Yes.

[56:08]

Yes. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I have solved the problem. I have a little black sheep at home. If I have a problem, for example, it is with defamation.

[57:15]

How should I defame you? Then I say, how should I defame you? I say, you stupid pig. A swine, I know that word. Is that good? We are getting into, I don't know why, we are, we are so entrenched now into the, you know, right in the country.

[59:09]

Now, whether it's in Helsinki or in the land, we have to get into [...] the land. I need to get used to the place and the city.

[60:15]

And I had this feeling of landing and I didn't know that landing takes so much time. But today I am particularly experienced with very intense feelings and also they change very quickly, so I am driven away with the thoughts and everything too. What do you want to talk about? and the cable to the car, and the cables [...] to the car,

[61:23]

And our memories. Take many things away from the memories, especially images. And it started happening already yesterday when I caught some of these pictures. They just came with a quick recipe book. You need some of these places. Again, this is going to happen a lot in the future. Thank you. And if you would just like to... You can feel as though the left is better than the right.

[63:23]

Thank you all very much. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But what? I'm too lost. and I feel very light and friendly as to what I want to do.

[64:43]

Okay. I don't know if you can hear me or not, but I feel that the way I'm communicating with people and the way I'm talking to them, I feel like I'm speaking to them. You have to go Do you want to say something before you go? Please. Yeah, sure, why don't you go get it. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

[65:44]

. Anyway, . And he's got such a brilliant smile. So many times, but any time you walk around and you look at his face, you think, there's so much light, you look straight after. And so I really think that . and then I will give it to you, and then we will be happy. It will be a blessing. God is good. Thank you. And it's then when I got to the episode where I wanted to really get on with my story.

[67:03]

So to speak to you, it's just been an opportunity to accept it. I would like to tell you one thing that I realized a little bit ago. I don't know if you can see it, but I had just a few hours of sleep without the phone. And so it was very... I don't catch all the words you give me anyway. or worse, . This is very interesting. It is very important that I just I listened to this, but I didn't try to go and try to accept it.

[68:15]

And after, it just went to where I did. I didn't get it. And I got it somehow. This was really what I wanted to get through. I love you very much. I want you to have me and I love you. So, you touched me. There's so much compassion. I thought that... Why don't you start the stick this way, and then maybe we can finish. Before you leave, since there was one thing I wanted to say, again, it doesn't necessarily apply to you, but since you're here... Again, people ask me every seminar, and in specific in seminars, how can we continue to practice together.

[69:17]

And if they can become my student, or if they can take the precepts. I don't really know the answer to the question. Like if you come to Crestone and we spend time together, this is a way that we get to know each other better and you get to see the tradition which is so much a part of how you come to understanding. Some people ask to see some pictures of it. I have some pictures of Crestone, though the pictures aren't what the practice is. Excuse me? The pictures aren't what the practice is, but some people ask me for pictures and I can show you afterwards. It depends what being a student or taking initiation means to you.

[70:19]

On one level, you're recognizing this is your path. And it helps to do that. It doesn't exclude anything. But it means you include everything in the path. That's one way of taking the precepts or an initiation or something like that. Another way is you develop a specific relationship with me or with someone as a teacher. And that has many dimensions. And in the biggest and also the smallest dimension, it's a dharma friend, somebody who shares the vision of practice and the reality of practice with you.

[71:37]

It's also a way to enter a very deep part of yourself That's a kind of mysterious action. It's also a way as a shortcut to know yourself because it's easier to know somebody else than to know yourself. So a teacher is somebody good, bad or indifferent who's willing to be known. And willing to sometimes interfere with that. But that process of knowing another person even if they try to prevent you, or are willing, is a shortcut to knowing yourself.

[72:40]

So, since I don't live here all the time, but this isn't, like I used to go to the Soviet Union, they couldn't even, there was no freedom to visit or travel. At least we can travel and see each other. So what I'm, I don't know exactly what to do. What I ask my students who really want to be disciples is I ask them to ask me several times and then to plant a tree. And after they've asked several times and they tell me they've planted a tree and where and so forth, Then I go the next step of taking some initiation or vows with them. But I would like to start doing this in Europe and not just do it in the United States.

[73:52]

And I have students who've planted trees in various parts of Europe. So what I might do is at some point have a seminar for a weekend in which there were teachings that went with the initiation and then on Sunday afternoon maybe a group of people would receive a lay initiation. And then some people, we might go one more step where they're really committing themselves to finding a way that we can spend time together to practice. They'd also like to wear Buddha's robe. Then they would make one of these. And I would give them a Buddhist name and so forth. Then some people might actually want to be ordained.

[75:16]

but just taking the precepts is enough and finding out how you and I can practice together because it is after all a relationship that needs actual time And third is to how you practice with each other and support each other's opportunity to practice here in your own city. So you can help me figure that out. Because I take your individual and lay practice completely seriously. We can start out with the mud seal and then take the water seal and the space seal together.

[76:35]

And that's what I just said is for the few of you who've asked me about this, but I thought I should say it to all of you. And forgive me for interfering with your departure. Is it okay with you if we take the time to go at least maybe a little bit quickly with the stick? Okay. Thank you. Bye-bye. Okay. Yes, you're welcome.

[77:36]

I didn't expect that I'd get to think today, but I want to say that I'm a student of God. But I am a sceptical person. Which is your community?

[78:52]

Yes, I am overjoyed. Yes, I am overjoyed. Yes, I am overjoyed. I am overjoyed. So first I want to show you like this. Don't sit in the front.

[80:21]

You may talk, some people talk a lot, but somehow it's my targetedness in your opinion. How you can just tell someone how to be. Now I am, I am not finished. I found most of this, I've been doing it for a year. But gave me that regard as well. Here from Canada. I think it's so valuable for the car. It's a car, not a regular car. But, um, you know, pretty tired of it, you know.

[81:23]

For me, I think, the meditation is very important to me. My hands are full, my mouth is open, I am just being myself. My opinion, the girl looks like a matupriya.

[82:56]

So you can sing if you'd like. Yes, yes. I understand.

[85:03]

And I want you to spin this way. Thank you. I have to do it on my own. Can you hear me? Yes, you are very serious, you know. Yes, I am very serious.

[86:33]

And it has a lot to do with the strength of the word of God. I don't know. I don't know the strength of the word of God. [...] Yes, good. Yes, what I want to say is... For example, if there is an idea for a dish, I will cook it.

[87:41]

If there is an idea for a dish, I will cook it. [...] Do you want to say something? No, you. Did anybody not get the stick? Who is happy not to get it or would like to get it? Thank you.

[88:47]

I appreciated all of what you said. And each, I think each, really I feel each thing you all said, each of you, has its own validity and is also a place of practice. Now to accept where you are, even the desire not to practice as a place of practice is really practice. I love critical people too. And skeptical people. Because skeptical people always think there's no proof, there's nothing, it's not, it's all. And skeptical people always think there's no proof, there's nothing, it's not, it's all. But also skeptical people, as you implied, are people who want proof in a hurry.

[90:03]

When it doesn't come in a hurry, they're skeptical. So you have to also be willing to wait. Now, this question of the koan came up a number of times, so let me say something very quickly about it. Let me say, though, that I hope I didn't say, maybe I did, that koan practice goes deeper than me. Because any practice can reach all of Buddhism. But there is some difference between the teachings. And to be very simple, I would say, if you all concentrate on this, And you achieve one pointedness on this.

[91:09]

And to really do that and to explore that, it takes a while. But to some extent you can do it pretty quickly. That ability to concentrate on that is shamatha. Okay. Once you've achieved concentration on that, I take that away and you can keep concentration on the empty field. That's shamatha and a deeper shamatha. Okay, you got that? Okay. Then when I bring the stick back up into this field and you examine this stick now from the field of concentration which you've maintained, That's vipassana.

[92:27]

When you let the stick speak to you, that's a koan. Okay. So koan practice is how to let each thing speak to you. How to let this phrase you've taken from yesterday's lecture speak to you. Now several of you have asked about having koans. And you can take a koan or a phrase from my lecture or from a koan book or something. And work with it. Bring it to me occasionally.

[93:28]

To formally have a koan that we work on together.

[93:31]

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